Why I’m Writing this Blog on Choosing an Authentic Life
Hello! My name is Diana and I want to share my purpose in writing this blog. There are many ways to share messages with each other. I have chosen to do a blog because I think there is power in writing to help us process what’s truly going on inside—and to honor the memory of my mom who always encouraged me to write.
My life has been filled with trauma, heartache, grief, abuse, depression, anxiety, shame, addictions, and fear to name a few. One of the central themes was always feeling alone because I didn’t feel connected to anyone. I believed that no one understood what I was going through and that I was destined to get through life’s difficulties completely alone. Fortunately, I found helpful tools through therapy over the years, including Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT).
However, for the past few years, I have been working with a psychologist who has taken my learning and level of understanding about who I am to a deeper level. He has brought in more tools through Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Internal Family Systems (IFS), Effortless Mindfulness, and more. We have been exploring through many discussions, practices, and experiments what it means to live an authentic life and how I can feel connection with others.
It is a difficult thing to explore because it goes against decades of programming to live an inauthentic life that I let be determined by others. Because of trauma, I learned how to live life in survival mode, choosing behaviors that would be seen as destructive but also kept me protected and alive. Now, trying to unravel the old stories and behaviors is creating a lot of chaos in my life.
However, it’s a different type of chaos. It’s one that brings new learning and understanding in a way I never thought possible. It can feel extremely painful at times as it means no longer avoiding thoughts and emotions I buried long ago or that get triggered even now. But the more I connect with my true nature, the more I find freedom from the shackles of living with masks, of trying to be the person I thought everyone else wanted me to be.
So this ongoing journey is what I want to share. Some posts will be past experiences, some will be new experiences, and some will be lessons learned or challenges I am currently experiencing. So, there may be overlap in some posts as I often keep revisiting the same learning over and over before it can fully sink in or accept it.
Not everything I share may resonate and that’s okay. This is my truth and not all of it will resonate with your own truth—but I do hope some of it will. At times I will reference God as my higher power. If that doesn’t resonate with you, I hope you can relate it to your own higher power, whatever that may be. Or just set the idea aside if it doesn’t feel right—or maybe your higher power is your own true nature.
My intention is never to get anyone to believe what I do but to offer something you can still relate to in whatever way fits with your experiences. I also want to add that what I say is not intended to represent anyone else’s beliefs or any religious affiliation I may belong to. All of this is just my own interpretation of the experiences in my own life.
My main intention is to offer a safe place for you to land and to create a space where we can all feel connected. It’s something I need and I’m guessing it’s something others need as well. I just want you to know you are not alone. I hope in reading this, you can feel a sense of connection—and join me on a journey of choosing an authentic life.
